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Betrayal

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"Today, five years ago, we started to talking. I know you before, but I didn´t dare to talk to you.
I saw that you are so outoing, happy, autentic… while I´m so shy, cold and low self-esteem….

Yes, I´m the perfect life form but… for what? Everyone who met me, wanted to take advantage of me, use me… I couldn´t trust anyone so I locked myself.

But you… you was so different… I wanted to meet you but I hadn´t value for it. Until this day five years ago you told me. First I was cold, distrustful, because I was afraid that you made me the same as the other people… but  quickly, I realiced the good hedgehog you were. I love so much talking to you, I feel so happy when we are together… we were different but too we had a lot of things in common… when I was with you, nothing else mattered. You made me a better hedgehog, happier, outgoing, warm…

And yes, over time, I began to feel something much deeper than a close friendship… That feelings scared me at first,  I had never felt this for anyone! I tried to repress it, but they were  growing and getting bigger and bigger… at first I thought you felt the same for me; you gave me that impression sometimes.

I don´t know… what I knew is that I love you so much and although you didn´t feel the same for me, our friendship was the most important thing to me.
Your voice... that smile which melt me... that green gaze with which I wanted to fuse...


But some years ago, darkness possessed you… I don´t know why, when and how, but you weren´t anymore the Sonic who I met.

You were in a bad mood, sad, bipolar, depressed… I couln´t understand you… but I wanted to help you, even in the distance… sometimes my Sonic came to light but always you fall back into the darkness and you didn´t let me get you out of there.

I swear that everything I did was for you, for make you happy, for show you that I´m here and I will be always for you. Because I loved you.

After a time no seeing,  we finally could meet again. Although thanks to you I was more outgoing and nearby, shyness and nerves took over me. Being with the hedgehog I admired and I loved the most makes me so happy and scared me at the same time. I was afraid of say samething silly, look ridiculous… not living up to your expectations… although I´m the ultimate life form, I feel so small by your side. Only you make me feel in this way.

Maybe that is what you didn´t like… maybe I was so shy, so quiet…  but it was because I didn´t know how to  answer  to these existential crisis you had… your pessimism it´s so contagious… not only that… I was so afraid that you notice that I was still in love with you … maybe I was too cold and distant with you. I don´t know…

But  after that meeting there was no more…

I wanted to see you but you always were bussy and when I tried to surprised you, you weren´t where I thought. Now that I know finally what I have to answer to you, now that I know how to help you. Now that at last we live near each other and we could spend time… together.

 

 After weeks without talking I exploded... I had always tried to put myself in your place, be patience, empathetic, not think badly about you when you ignore me or don´t answer my messages. But I was on my limit.

I'm sorry if I've offended you… I was so angry and I couln´t control what I said to you. But nevertheless , after years of friendship, trust, share everthing, open our souls to each other … the last thing I expected was your reply… I thought you apologize or even you get angry… but never… even on my worst nightmares, I imagined that the hedgehog I loved the most and for who I would make everything, would made to me something so cruel and despicable.

You kicked me out of your life with four miserable messages… you said that we are so different, we have anything to talk, there are no reciprocity… that both go for separate ways…

Without letting me speak,call you or talking in person…

How you dare to make that to me? Something so cruel, miserable, despicable and coward…to me! Who made whatever I could to make you happy, to show you that you can trust on me, that I will be always for you! After all we had share and talk… not even you give me the chance to fix it… not even you dare to face me and say that to me!

I admired you, I loved you!

You destroyed me… I gave you my heart and I can accept that you reyected it, but what I not is that you pull out and throw to my face as I meant anything to you.

Did you say that we have anything in common?? Well, now we are depressive and don´t have any heart.

But maybe, mine could regenerate but yours… never.

It won´t end like this. Later or soon, I will face you and I will demand  an explanation… we can resolve this… anyway, there are a lot of things that I will have to say to you. I´m sunken in shit, but you will come with me.

Because you lied me… you betrayed me… you destroyed me…

More than a moth has passed and I still reminding you… I still missing you… sometimes I hate you and I want to make you suffer as you have done to me… but sometimes I blame myself for don´t  doing what I had to do at the time… for don´t conffes my feelings althought you tell me you weren´t gay… for overcome my shyness… for… I don´t know.

I always remember you… a song, a word, a film… all reminds me you. I miss so much our conversations, our understanding, our relationship…. I never had met anyone like you. Anyone makes me feel the same as you.

I can feel happy and proud because I knew the real Sonic, the happy and autentic hedgehog.

No one will love you like me, because for the others there are only darkness."




Bffff long time no drawing those dudes! I am not into Sonic anymore but I had to make this.

At last I make honor to my nickname! X'D 

Sorry if my english makes your eyes bleed XD
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© 2016 - 2024 Mimy92Sonadow
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isighnedformature's avatar
this is truly amazing